Zaire Allen

I'm 28 at the time of this writing. Over the last 11 years, I've honed my skills in product and marketing. I did this to escape the working class.

Why? Because I grew up poor in a single-parent household as an immigrant. Life is tougher when you're poor. It's filled with lower-quality and limited experiences.

My goal from childhood has always been to reduce my family's financial burdens. I guess I have a hero complex.

This led me to build businesses. Like most entrepreneurs, I have more lists of failures than I do wins. But, the wins offset the failures tenfold. I've helped people and businesses make nine times the amount I've seen in my career. It's around $18 million in stakeholder value.

Today, I wondered what the cost of my achievements was.

Here are the costs:

- I missed family and friends' social activities. My family probably thought I didn't love them.

- Tens of thousands of hours were spent on solving the wrong problems.

- Severe anxiety plagued me for eight of the 11 years.

- At least $2,000 on talking therapy.

- Many failed relationships because I had been emotionally unavailable.

- Friendships failed because of misunderstandings.

- Alcoholism as a form of escapism.

These experiences weren't in vain. On the flip side, I've grown through these experiences.

- I've learned my lesson with money management and more time making stable investments. It's hard to know how to be practical with lots of money. No one around you understands what it's like to be in your 20s with more money than sense.

- My loved ones were more understanding than I had expected. I lived in my head too much.

- I've worked close to 28,000 hours over a decade. I have a depth of experience in design, sales, and marketing. I feel like a Swiss army knife. There's not much I can't do.

- Working through anxiety was the best thing I've done for my psyche. Learning how to work through discomfort and accept reality is incredible for resilience. My self-confidence improved without me working on it.

- Therapy gave me great mental tools. I trust myself to figure things out no matter how dire things get. This was the biggest catalyst in my mental preparation for moving to New York City.

- Looking back, I see that those relationships did not fit who I wanted to become. These scenarios made me a better partner. I'm still far from perfect, but I'm a work in progress.

- I'm more cautious about who I share my thoughts with. You can't take everyone with you.

- I've replaced my alcoholism with real holidays. I left the country twice in that decade of intense work. I now leave the country more to relax and reset.